You are the best thing

You Are The Best Thing – Ray Lamontagne

I may have already posted this song a while back, but I seriously cannot get enough of it. It just makes me SUCH a happy woman when I hear it. /nerding out

Nachrichten

• I need a paper day-planner. As much as I love my color-coordinated Google Calender, I need, like TasteLikeCrazy, a pen & paper method to scratch shit off. Too bad it’s NOVEMBER and you can’t get a day planner in November without going to 2010 or buying a $2 2009 one. *grumble grumble grumble*
• I also need some new moisturizer. I was going to go to Sephora today to get some Hope in a Jar SPF 20 (HOPE! in a jar! WITH SPF!) but got productive instead and wrote about hostile cervical mucus.
• I love my job.
• SPEAKING of jobs … I got hired on as a Study Coordinator for an amazing National Institute of Health sponsored project Health & Biomedical Science for a Diverse Community. I applied on a whim because they asked for a degree in public health – and guess what? I GOT IT! I’m going to get to do some research, to do some writing, to do some teaching, to use my degree and get paid to do it. I cannot believe how fortunate I am feeling right now.
• Yesterday on my way home from spending three days with my City-folk (one of which who includes Ewokmama), I tweeted something that I can’t get out of my head. I haven’t been as happy as I am (right now, yesterday, lately) in years. YEARS people. I worried that moving to the Bay Area would be a bad plan for me – because it was mostly spur of the moment and a decision made by my heart and not my head – but this has been one of the best decisions I think I’ve ever made. I’m proud of myself for following my heart this time.
• My weekend was amazing. I didn’t really mean to spend so much time in the City but traffic and then already-made plans kept me there an “extra” night. I thoroughly enjoyed myself. I still can’t decide, though, whether I want to live in the East Bay (I love the feel out here) or be in the City (I love the closeness of my people there). Cost-wise it’s smarter to live in the East Bay but I would probably make up the cost difference paying tolls to visit Ewokmama, The Cabana Boy and TheMister. I’m debating. I also kinda like living with (or super-near) VDog and the rest of the Cracker-crew.
• Right now? I have to pee. I’m too lazy to get up. I’m also afraid I’ll lose my writing mojo. Guess this can be considered a whole entry though … okay, fine.
• Time to post & pee.

Houston Radios Mission Silence

My weekend was phenomenal. I’m just sayin’ ya’ll should be jealous.

More later this week, I’m sure.

Prime

2. Yesterday, I totally meant what I said. I went to bed a very happy woman last night. I had a weekend where things were good and things were rough and then things were good and then things were great. I loved it. That’s what weekends are supposed to be. Oh, yeah, and it was full o’love.

3. Since my last real entry, I’ve had a cold for 15 days. I’ve been coughing for over two weeks. Thankfully it’s mostly been a “productive” cough and my throat isn’t raw anymore because of it. This cold has been nasty, and to be totally honest, I’m pretty sure I had swine flu, but I was never seen for it, nor did I take any medication. I didn’t die. It lasted probably longer than it could have, but I’m alive and it was either swine flu or walking pneumonia. Seriously, it got pretty nasty at times. Thankfully VDog and Warrior (as well as TheMister and Ewokmama) did great jobs taking care of me while I hacked around them. TheMister deserves a freakin’ award … the man kissed me while I was infected (thankfully he didn’t end up with whatever the hell it was that I had) and he didn’t quarantine himself from me.

5. I would have been way bummed had TheMister actually made me stay away from him. I’m in trouble with this man. I haven’t blogged about him for reals yet, but the notebook that has an entire (maybe two?) entry(ies) in it about him right next to me. *looks to the left … pushes it away from her … doesn’t know that she’s ready for that much of her heart to be on the intArwebZ* He knows how I feel about him, we’re both very clear about how we feel about one another (which I’m thankful for … the fact that I can be honest w/him and the fact that he’s vocal/physical about how he feels), but putting things into words for other people, I don’t know that I am ready for that just yet. I’m a grown woman … seriously, why is this such a 8th-grade issue for me? Okay, yeah, so I’m smitten. I’m glad he knows. Too bad my face is totally red right now telling ya’ll. It’s been a long time, friends (and strangers, too, I guess), been a long time. I kinda like the feeling. Actually, I really like it. I don’t even want to try to put into words how he makes me feel. I think maybe pictures of fluffy sheep, happy clouds and a couple of unicorns farting rainbows might make a clearer picture for ya’ll. /embarrassing herself online for the evening

7. My phone is in standby mode. I killed it talking to MyMidWestLove tonight. I can’t wait until Thursday when ya’ll understand why she’s my MMWL! I’m super-happy after talking to her. She totally gets me. TOTALLY.

11. I’ve found out something else I miss from Portland. The lack of round-abouts/roundabouts/traffic circles. This circle (Marin) in particular just pisses me off. This circle is a main one in the area I’m living in … you would think that people would KNOW HOW TO DRIVE in it … right? No. I have almost been hit at least three times in the three weeks (as of tomorrrow!) that I’ve been living here. That’s not right. It’s not me, I understand the rules of driving a roundabout.

13. @VDog is in New York City this week. I haven’t hugged her face in almost 24 hours and, oh my god this makes me sound pathetic but, I miss my housewife. Last night we had no cable (*gasp*) and no internet (*dies*) but we managed to have a real conversation and still laugh about whatever we were talking about. I guess that’s the sign of a real friendship … you can talk without the internet. Kinda sad? Nah. Never.

17. I’m seriously bothered by the fact that I chose to use prime numbers for this. I think I’ll go with this definition of prime, though, it makes me smile: the time of maturity when power and vigor are greatest. Yeah baby. Great power and vigor. Oh, wait … everyone can see this.

19. I am going to Vegas for the Vegas Birthday Bash with some of my best friends. This is probably a totally DANGEROUS idea because my best friends are going, but OMG my best friends are getting old and I get to celebrate with them. !!!I’m not getting as old as them!!! No, wait, that’s bitchy of me to say. Sorry girly-faces … I’m super excited and know that it’s going to be a blast that you’re getting older. I’m hoping to convince (?) TheMister that he should go with me … does he need convincing or should I just show him more of my bewbies? TheMister is going too … this is going to be fun.

23. I have some of the best best friends in the world. Just saying. Seriously. Ya’ll should be jealous. I should talk about them more, eh? Maybe one day … don’t want to have all my blog friends hate me that much.

29. There has apparently been a ton more drama at the place I used to work. That makes me laugh. No, seriously, not just giggle a little bit, that makes me laugh. I would MUCH rather have “I NEED TO PEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!” drama than “Can we make our sales goals TODAY!?” drama? Is it sad that almost-three-year-old drama is easier to take care of than adult WORK issues that occur.

31. I haven’t had a cheeseburger in over a week. It was apparently totally a PMS thing. (I’m sure you all need to know that. Yup.) Had my iron fill and I’m good to go now.

37. On top of PMS, spending my time around so many beautiful toddlers has made my ovaries do insane things. Seriously. SERIOUSLY. First they just hurt. Then they ached. Then they started screaming at me. I am getting old people. I don’t want children until the time is right but I know I’m getting older. I have, what?, ten years before my already-broken ovaries shut down on me statistically? /talking work online … yeah … work … speaking of this

41. I’ve been given a new topic at work. I don’t mind the topic changes – it’s always given me a GREAT opportunity to learn new things about my public health interests, but having NO experience what so ever in this field is hard. I have a really tough time making a connection to it. I am learning to form those connections, but it has been an interesting process thus far.

43. That’s it. This entry turned into a REAL entry but numbered instead of paragraphed and flowing and NORMAL writing like I should do. Be glad I didn’t show you pictures of anything … oh, wait … that would mean I’d have to take pictures of things, huh? *next week’s goal*

Content

Going to bed on a Sunday night feeling loved & emotionally satiated is one of my favorite feelings in the world. I have good people in my life, let me tell ya.

Quick game of catch

• up
• I’ve had a cold for over 10 days now. I’m essentially at all of the symptoms of pneumonia right now (except a perpetually “junky” cough) but I’m holding off on a clinic visit at least another 24 hours in hopes that it’s not really the case. I don’t do sick well and am tired of the insane amount of coughing I’ve been doing. It’s interrupting my life and making me grouchy.
• I’m not single anymore. *looks around* *hears crickets chirping* Yeah, I kept my big mouth quiet for a really long time now but even without the “DTR” talk, I’m pretty sure I have a boyfriend (or as Miss Disgrace says a man friend). Some people know what’s been going on in my dating life (thanks those of you who have been teasing me non-stop), but most of you haven’t been privy to the amazingness that is this guy. I have a whole post (scribbled in my journal at 11pm on a train home from Portland) about him, but he’s requested a pseudonym and I feel kind stuck when trying to assign him a label. Suggestions from the peanut gallery? *waves to the amazingness that is the guy*
• I’ve realized that I miss one thing from Portland; the radio stations. Nothing else. Seriously, that’s weird, right? Maybe not. I miss people from the area, but not the area in general.
• Sterling Savings Bank has been served with a cease and desist letter. A C & D letter is essentially telling the bank to shape up or ship out. Read more about why I’m even more thankful to have left the bank here and here. Never before have I mentioned the name of the bank I used to work at, but I am comfortable sharing the fact that legal action is being pursued against my former employer. I knew something big was going down. I’m glad I got off the ship before it sank.
• I’ve had a cheeseburger for dinner two nights in a row. I was apparently desperate for cow. *moos* California cheeseburgers are better than Oregon cheeseburgers, too.
• I think that’s it. Anything I’m missing?

*cough hack sniff*

Being sick is no fun, but being sick as an adult totally sucks. No one wants to bring you Otter Pops, tea & chicken noodle soup – you’re an adult, you can go get it yourself! Other adults realize that you could be contagious so you’re stuck to internet conversations (because your voice is gone & you can’t use the telephone without being teased). What really sucks is when you know you “don’t do sick well” … when all you want to do is be a productive member of society but all you can do is whine about mucus.

Once upon a sometime

1. Insomnia sucks.
2. Insomnia really sucks when you don’t feel well. (The House of Cracker is sharing a cold.)
3. Insomnia really sucks when you don’t feel well and have too much on your mind.
4. You get the pattern, and when you wanted to both go to the DMV & go for a run later today.

I took a nap today because I feel like I’m fighting off a cold, but it has left me up until 1am, listening to music (Us – Regina Spektor from the 500 Days of Summer album) and wondering about what my plans are morphing into.

The end of Chapter 1 feels is a cliffhanger, ya’ll; my fingers are just barely supporting me. Good thing I know some people willing to catch me when I relax my grip and trust myself enough to let go.

Adjusting

If you don’t follow me on Twitter, aren’t my Facebook friend or have never hugged my face in person, you probably don’t know that I made it to Berkeley safely. I did. On Tuesday afternoon. The drive was, uhm, good and bad. I have had a fantastic first few days and both my brain and heart are in overwhelmation*-mode right now and I’m trying to figure out a whole new life. A whole new, really fun, full of love, fantastically amazing life. Chapter 1 is working itself out.

Portland, I’ll be back for less than 24 hours next week. Prepare yourself.

*yes, that’s a word … just like sotally, totes and hoobity. I promise.

Chapter 1

I woke up early this morning and laid here in perfect silence. My room is quiet, my house is quiet, my building is quiet, my neighborhood is quiet. My brain, my heart and my soul are also silent. The latter three are what I’m most surprised about, though.

I’m not quite sure how to describe the peace I’m feeling this morning. I’m not used to my body’s subtle reminders; ‘everything is ok’ … ‘you’re doing the right thing’ … ‘you succeeded at what you never thought you could do.’

Today I start a new chapter in my life & the silence tells me that I couldn’t be more ready.